Changing Our Everyday

Welcome to the March Mindful Mama Carnival: Mindful Mama Challenge

This post was written for inclusion in the Mindful Mama Carnival hosted by Becoming Crunchy and TouchstoneZ. This month our participants have challenges they’ve set for themselves toward becoming more mindful. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

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I am challenging myself this month to become more mindful of my environment and the way I live day to day. I know my kids and I have made a big adjustment moving to the other side of the country recently and I want to be sure there is a feeling of comfort and that we are living efficiently enough to achieve our goals. Mainly things are out of place in our lives right now. There is no continuity in anything. I’m probably exaggerating there, but I really want there to be more of a routine, more for my kids(and myself) to depend on.

Right now, we don’t really know any other kids. There are some kids in the neighborhood, but when we go outside they’re going inside or they’re just too old for my kids to play with. It would be nice to have playdates or attend some kind of play-oriented class or program at the library.
We’re also struggling with space in my mom’s house. Our closet is filled up with my mom’s things. I tried to store our thing in containers, but there’s nowhere to put them that the kids can’t reach, and when they reach them they make a mess of everything. I’m constantly changing where our things go and it is because I haven’t come up with a sustainable system.

On that same topic, we don’t really have any clothes for warm weather. My mom has a ton of clothes she is holding onto that she can’t wear and I think it would be great to try to recycle her clothing rather than buy new clothes for myself and my daughters. I have a great little sewing machine that I left here years ago, and maybe it would do me some good to express to my mom my ideas about minimalism and non-consumerist values, which are coming into play between her and my oldest daughter.

Which brings me to my next goal; entertainment for my kids really needs to change. My mom and aunt recently bought my 4 year old Barbie dolls. They come with these little sheets of paper that have pictures of several other dolls in that series and my daughter whines non-stop about the other dolls she wants.

I know that despite my goals of showing her what is really important in life and that she doesn’t need these things, her environment will have a big effect on how she really feels about it. I need to engage her in new, creative and adventurous things. I don’t want her to fasten onto the idea of buying stuff, I want her to learn to create and appreciate what she has.

I think that keeping a schedule of activities to do regularly, field trips and surprise activities, and free play will help a lot. I also think I need to organize their toys better and put them into sections. I need to limit her to playing with a few things at a time, and take toys away when they become a problem, bringing them out later after the novelty has died down.

Lastly I really want to make the most of my time. This is a temporary situation, living with my mom again. I want to get memorable and transformational moments out of this. I don’t want to be passive aggressive and upset that things aren’t going my way and my parenting philosophies aren’t being accepted. I need to set an example.

Instead of being upset that the TV is on all the time, I need to set up a fun activity, engage my mom with the things we have in common, like scrapbooking, and get us all in a space to create, support and get to know each other better. I need to allow my kids to feel comfort in their surroundings and I need to feel like this is my home too, however temporary it may be, I need to allow myself to enjoy it, I need to grow while I am here and not feel stunted due to the change in household.

I have already started on this challenge by talking to my mom and my daughter about having a more active, creative lifestyle and I’m currently setting several alarms a day to make sure we stay on track, meet our goals and have planned activities. I think I’m on a path to really transforming as a parent, not just in this situation, but for the long-term. The perceived limitations I face here are making me stronger, more appreciative and more organized.

 

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14 thoughts on “Changing Our Everyday

  1. Pingback: Mindful Meditations « TouchstoneZ

  2. I always tell myself that I am exactly where I need to be (regardless of what is happening) and it seems like you are doing that too. Yes, every circumstance is a learning opportunity and you are both brave and wise to embrace the possibilities.

    Joy to you!

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  5. I think you’re really wise. And that you’ll get so much out of making the most of this time with your mom. You’re giving her a gift too, I think. She’ll get to know her grandchildren in a deeper way…
    Everyone wins.
    I’m just really impressed with your ability to consciously choose to transform and grow. I hope you enjoy this time and make wonderful memores.

  6. Life has a funny knack of transforming when you least expect it. A few little changes and a miracle may happen…
    I do the daily reminders/alarms on my phone – otherwise we get lost in the day. Good luck in your quest, you’ll get there in the end xx

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  8. Pingback: Mindful playing with my Daughters. | OmSheSaid

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  10. “Lastly I really want to make the most of my time. This is a temporary situation, living with my mom again. I want to get memorable and transformational moments out of this. I don’t want to be passive aggressive and upset that things aren’t going my way and my parenting philosophies aren’t being accepted. I need to set an example.”

    This part to me would be the biggest challenge. It can be hard adapting to living with others and easy for the atmosphere to become charged with animosity. I myself find it very difficult to live with others but I do believe that if you work through the issues, the relationships that follow are more real and far stronger than they would otherwise be. I spent a few years living with my MIL before my husband and I could afford a place of our own and although we had our tough times, we all survived and are very close now. I will be keeping this challenge in mind when we go on holiday with my mother, step dad and brothers to a country cottage in the summer!

  11. How easy it is at times to just let life go by without really thinking…

    I love how you are finding mindfulness in these every day things – I’m coming to believe it’s one of the most important things we can do. Hoping this is a truly blessed time for you and thank you for sharing your Mindful Mama Challenge. :)

  12. Whew! Those are some big adjustments to make while keeping balanced. I really like how you’ve checked in with your needs and have come up with some creative, compassionate ways to help meet those needs. Moving in with a parent adds some extra, subtle complexities to parenting. It can bring up your own issues from childhood and can seem like judgment when you are making different choices in your role as parent. I’ll look forward to following along with the changes you make.

    Thank you for participating in the Mindful Mama Carnival.

  13. I think it’s wonderful all you are doing to create special moments and memories with your family and making the most how you are now living. Kudos to you and making this list…you are that much closer to fulfilling it and making it habit!

  14. Pingback: Waking up with Meditation | Presence Parenting

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